We always thought we would have kids. We started trying when we believed we were ready. A month went by, then two months, six months, a year. Nothing happened.

Something was wrong, but nobody could tell us what - and they still can't to this day. We tried IVF three times but our results were not good. We were devastated.

Eighteen months after our last IVF cycle, we knew we would not be having our own children. And, somehow, we have moved to a life that is much different to the one we thought we'd have.

This blog is about what we do now we know we won't be having children - the thoughts, dreams, realities, sorrows, and joys that have become our new life path.

I hope you will enjoy what I will be sharing, and I hope that if you are at the point where life without children is a reality for you, that you might find some hope and inspiration here.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Naughty Parents...

I was at the pedestrian lights near my work today waiting for the ‘go-ahead’ to walk across the road. A couple with their little boy (who was perhaps three or four years of age) were on the other side of the road waiting for the lights as well. The man had pressed the button to cross a few moments before I arrived at the kerb.
The lights had not changed for us to walk and the man stepped out onto the road taking his little boy with him. There wasn’t any traffic – luckily. My first thought was that if their little boy is hit by a car one day then they will only have themselves to blame.

On the way home tonight I was driving up a one way street (going the right way I should add) when a woman came the other way on her bike in a way that that meant I had to stop and wait for her. I was annoyed, but I was really annoyed when I saw she had a tiny child on the back of her bike. Way to go lady – teach your kid bad habits from a young age.

I was incensed at the thought that these people had been able to have a child and I was unable to. I quite often feel this way when I see a parent doing something stupid that could put their child in harm’s way. Surely I would never have done such a thing if I had a child. Well, maybe in a perfect world.

It is very easy for me look at parents and think harshly about what they are doing or not doing – to put a judgement call on what I see in comparison to what I think I would have been like as a mother. The reality is that nobody is perfect and everybody makes decisions and takes actions that are not so smart – including parents. This doesn’t mean that they love their children any less or that they would not give the whole world to keep them safe. I should add that I’ve made plenty of not so smart decisions too!

I know that I’ve done dumb things in the past, and I’m sure that, as a mother, I would have made bad decisions as well. I guess I need to suck up my judgemental attitude and realise we are all just human – although there is a line and people deliberately harming their children…well, that’s another post.

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